Stages of Prayer

Many people tell me, "I'm not good at prayer." However, in most cases, the real problem is not that we are "good" or "bad" at prayer -- those are moral categories. Rather, we haven't learned that prayer is a multifaceted experience.

Just as a baseball player needs to learn several different skills--hitting, throwing, catching, and how to run the bases--so a follower of Christ needs different prayer "skills." Or, perhaps it's easier to think of these skills as natural phases through which we progress.

Too many people have continued to view prayer through the eyes of a small child -- "give me, give me, give me." It is time for us to develop a more mature way of praying, so we can experience the delight of relating to God as our "Abba" (Papa).

Mark Thibodeaux has done a good job of articulating these phases in his book, Armchair Mystic:

• Talking at God -- reciting parents or other authorities taught us to pray, e.g. "Bless these gifts, O Lord, which we are about to receive through Christ our Lord."
• Talking to God -- becoming more comfortable finding our own words to speak to God.
• Listening to God -- When we begin listening to God, we are starting to develop a genuine two-way relationship with Him.
• Being with God -- At this stage, we enjoy simply being in the presence of the God who loves us. Our prayer may have words, or it may be wordless. It doesn't really matter because His presence is what gives meaning to the prayertime.
  

Just Because You Don't See Them Doesn't Mean...

In The Old Patagonian Express, Paul Theroux wrote:

"There were shacks all over these hills, in the most unlikely places, built against boulders and cave entrances, and at the bottom of sand pits. I came to fear them, because at each one there was a mangy dog that ran out and yapped at me, snarling into its paws. I was genuinely frightened of being bitten by one of these mutts: they had a crazy rabid look, and a bark from one excited barks from other dogs hidden all over the stony hillside. Giving these dogs a wide berth, I strayed from the mule tracks. . . .

"I mentioned the dogs to a Columbian that evening. There seemed to be a lot of mutts in the hills, I said. Were they dangerous? 'Some of the dogs are dangerous,' he said. 'But all of the snakes are deadly poisonous.' 'I did not see any snakes.' 'Maybe not. But they saw you.'"

I think that's a parable. How often do we guard ourselves against the dogs we can see when it's the snakes that we don't see that are much more likely to kill us? How often are we blind to the real dangers in life? That's one reason we need to live in community with others. Others can help me deal with some of my blind spots.

What Kind of Prayer?

I love this picture of two hands gripped in fervent prayer. And that is how we often think of prayer -- someone desperately imploring God to perform a miracle, to heal someone they love or get themselves out of a jam.

But doesn't this omit the best part of prayer? Isn't it like children who only come to their parents when they want something? The main goal of prayer should be to grow in our relationship to God. Then, when we ask God to do something, we will ask with confidence because we will truly the know the One of whom we are making the request.

"If I could just sit with you awhile -- I need you to hold me, moment by moment, 'till forever passes by."

The "Now" of Eternity

Sunday I talked about the importance of setting our hearts on "things above" rather than on "earthly things" (Col. 3:1-2). However, I had to explain that this did not mean that we are to ignore life's ongoing demands -- paying the bills and taking care of the house and nurturing our kids. Rather, we need to remember that this is not all there is. In fact, the various arenas of life--work, school, and home--are our arenas of ministry. These areas of life desperately need a "things above" perspective.

Eternal life is not out there after we die. It is present here and now as we entrust ourselves to God. Jesus said, "Now this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent" (John 17:3).

Changing our viewpoint can change everything.

Hard-Earned Wisdom

I like all of Donald Miller's books, but I think A Million Miles in a Thousand Years is his best since Blue Like Jazz. That's partly because, as he ages, he's learning some things about himself and about life, and he's willing to share these things with readers.

For instance, after the devastating breakup with the girl he thought he was going to marry, he realized something important:

...For years I'd thought of love as something that would complete me, make all my troubles go away. I worshipped at the altar of romantic completion. And it had cost me, plenty of times. And it had cost most of the girls I'd dated, too, because I wanted them to be something they couldn't be. It's too much pressure to put on a person. I think that's why so many couples fight, because they want their partners to validate them and affirm then, and if they don't get that, they feel as though they're going to die. And so they lash out. But its' a terrible thing to wake up and realize the person you just finished crucifying didn't turn out to be Jesus.

That's something a lot of people--married and single--need to learn!

Where's Norm?

We had a lot of fun at the "Welcome Back, Norm" event -- the choir sounded great as they sang the National Anthem; we enjoyed watching the Beavers together; and then there was this! Can you spot the Real Norm Langston?

Weddings, Weddings, Weddings!

This was my all-time "wedding month"!

It began with my nephew's July 31 wedding, proceeded to my son and daughter-in-law's wedding on August 15, continued with Nic & Lindsay's wedding on Aug. 23, and culminated with Abe & Renee's Aug. 30 ceremony.

Sunday we had a beautiful location--Timberline Lodge--for the beautiful ceremony of a beautiful couple! Actually, there was more to it than that, since Abe & Renee met on a hike in the Mt. Hood National Forest and eventually climbed Mt. Hood together.

Congratulations to a fantastic couple (as well as the other three couples)!