Many people tell me, "I'm not good at prayer." However, in most cases, the real problem is not that we are "good" or "bad" at prayer -- those are moral categories. Rather, we haven't learned that prayer is a multifaceted experience. Just as a baseball player needs to learn several different skills--hitting, throwing, catching, and how to run the bases--so a follower of Christ needs different prayer "skills." Or, perhaps it's easier to think of these skills as natural phases through which we progress.
Too many people have continued to view prayer through the eyes of a small child -- "give me, give me, give me." It is time for us to develop a more mature way of praying, so we can experience the delight of relating to God as our "Abba" (Papa).
Mark Thibodeaux has done a good job of articulating these phases in his book, Armchair Mystic:
- Talking at God -- reciting parents or other authorities taught us to pray, e.g. "Bless these gifts, O Lord, which we are about to receive through Christ our Lord."
- Talking to God -- becoming more comfortable finding our own words to speak to God.
- Listening to God -- When we begin listening to God, we are starting to develop a genuine two-way relationship with Him.
- Being with God -- At this stage, we enjoy simply being in the presence of the God who loves us. Our prayer may have words, or it may be wordless. It doesn't really matter because His presence is what gives meaning to the prayertime.
